Mary’s Story – Part 4

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

I had very specific ideas about having a second wedding. You see my children had been blindsided when their father picked them up one day not long after our divorce and told them he had gotten married. Although they knew the woman he married they had not been prepared for this announcement. They were devastated. When this happened I promised my children that I would never do that to them. That I would discuss any marriage plans I would have in the future with them and they would most certainly be a part of any wedding plans. Four years later I knew I would hold true to this promise.

Believe me planning to mix two families is not an easy task. Especially when you have 3 teenage girls who each have their own ideas of how everything will work and they were not afraid to voice their opinions! Whew what a task we were embarking on!

We prayed that God would provide us a clear path as we didn’t have a clue how to blend these two families, two houses, etc. God did indeed answer our prayers. We each sold our respective houses by word of mouth! What a savings in realtor fees! That was the easy part. It was important to us that we start out on an even playing field. Meaning that we get a house new to each of our families. That way no territory dilemmas! But looking for a house the right size and in the right school area was tricky. We looked at several and they just weren’t what we were looking for. Each time our realtor pulled together listings one particular house always came up right size, right location, ugly house! It was 3 blocks from where I was living and I just thought it was a big ugly brick house! Finally I conceded and we went to look at it. It did indeed have everything we were looking for. The kids were fairly in favor of it (the best we could hope for anyway). So we put in an offer and it was accepted.

The move was just a pain. Combining two complete households into one is not an easy task. I was exhausted every night. We finished moving my stuff the day before the wedding. I was so worn out I couldn’t complete the last load. We have amazing friends and they stuck in to the end. It was very difficult leaving our haven of the last several years, but it was on to a new adventure in life.

The wedding was beautiful (if I do say so myself). All of our children stood up with us and my son (7 years old) walked me down the aisle. I was so proud of him. My step-daughter sang a beautiful song for us. Then when the lighting of the unity candle came up we chose to include the whole family so they all had their own candle and we all lit the big candle together, uniting our family together in front of God and all the witnesses. It was amazing.

I’d like to say that we all lived happily ever after but that wasn’t the case. Bringing two families together isn’t as easy as one might think. It’s a lot of work plus some! And as we were trying our best to fight little battles and keep peace with everyone (did I mention 3 teenaged girls!?!) I began to notice that I was really out of shape. I’d get half the lawn mowed and come in breathing hard and exhausted. I’d carry the laundry up the stairs and have to stop and catch my breath. This didn’t seem right. I needed to get more exercise or something. I casually mentioned this to my family doctor and she immediately set me up with some testing. I thought she was over reacting just a bit. I was just out of shape! Thankfully God knew what he was doing when he prompted me to tell the Doctor. We were embarking on a journey that we had no idea was coming our way. And we had only been married 6 weeks!

(More to come, later, when Mary gets back from vacation!)